Monday, April 18, 2011

Hair cuttery

I cannot do small talk. Yes, I know you guys must be shocked. Me, SJ the only-nonsense, 24/7 talking crap girl can't do small talk. Two reasons- I can't say what I really want to say (that would be disastrous) and in some places I just want to get the job done and go home. The hair salon is a good example. Just cut my hair tell how much, I pay we say bye bye I prefer it this way and so do the people in the Desi hair salon. But that freaking place is 15mins drive and I have to wait for J to take me there. The local one is a 5min walk from my place and I just had to lose 1kg (what better and easy way to lose weight than to cut your hair). And this was what happened.

She- Hello, what you want.
Me (what I said WS) - hair cut
(what I wanted to say WWS)- Bra fitting! WTH woman this is a hair salon right?

She- You want shampoo?
Me WS- yes
WWS- hell yeah!
I don't know you folks but I love to get my hair washed by hands other than mine. Just sit back and relax while those hands work magic..aaahhh..just like chocolate melting in your mouth. ahhhh.... sooo nice...yeahh there that area has been itching for some days yessss....ahhh...

She- My name Sun what yours?
WTH!!! Really, now? Introductions??!
Me WS- SJ
WWS- Moon hahahhahaa...

She- you from India?
Me WS- yeah
WWS-Is that why you woke me up?

She- yeah I can tell.
Me WS- grin
WWS- great. Next year's Noble award goes to you.

She- India people have thick hair. Yours so thick.
Me WS- grin
WWS- ayooo..aunty please stop.

She- what you do for such thick hair?
Me WS- grin
WWS- eat gobar.

She- Now your hair heavy because its wet. Its heavy?
Me WS- yeah.
WWS- you want to weigh it?

She- ha ha your face so leetil, hair so heavy.
Me WS- grin
WWS- someone just kill me.

We then proceeded to her station for the hair cut.
cut cut cut
She- so thick your hair.
Me WS- grin
WWS- gun or machete which is better?

She- veeddy dry also...so much hair.
Me WS-.....
WWS- Dear God, why thou me hatest?
cut cut cut cut cut cut cut cut cut cut cut cut cut cut cut cut cut cut remember its veddy thick cut cut cut cut cut cut cut cut cut cut

She- done. you like it?
Me- yeah. Can you just blow dry also?
She- BLOW DRY?
The look on her face was just priceless LOL!
She- Blow dry is extra 10$.
Like that was going to deter me. I love a blow dry as much I love getting my hair shampooed by a stranger :D

wheeeeeee.....

She- so thick you need to thin it leetil
Me WS- .......
WWS- how? take bath in HCl?
She- ok all done.
Me WS-sigh (yeah I really did sigh)
WWS-Hallelujah!

OK now don't you guys start feeling sorry for Ms. Sun and start to think that I am a evil client. Ms. Sun convinced me that I needed some special shampoo and conditioner for my thick hair.

J- You were gone for so long!
Me- Yeah shampoo, cut and blow dry took time.
J- how much ?
Me- 70$
J- Whaaa?? Its just 20$ for a cut.
Me- Yeah, she made me buy some shampoo/conditioner and charged extra for the blow dry because I have 'veddy thick' hair.
J- The Desi salon is better, no?
Me- ..............


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8 comments:

  1. Saee Koranne-KhandekarApril 18, 2011 at 10:47 AM

    lol. This is priceless! I've missed your writinh--welcome back, SJ! I've been procrastinating in the hair cut area, too. But your shampoo description is making me want to call and get an appointment for NOW!

    ReplyDelete
  2. UnknownApril 18, 2011 at 11:15 AM

    70!! OMG! But hilarious! I go to a desi girl, who lives verrry close by (and for 70 pretty dolls she will do waxing, threading, hair color, hair cut and a facial... with a remainder of 10 dollars!) hehe...

    ReplyDelete
  3. NikitaApril 18, 2011 at 11:40 AM

    haha...i face the opposite problem. ur hair so thin... :(
    seriously...what do u do for veddy thick hair? :)

    ReplyDelete
  4. amnaApril 18, 2011 at 9:41 PM

    a new post on MV. my day has been made *sob*

    Ps: I hate you for having veddy thick hair. our gen is s upposed to have premature greys, thinning hair and itchy scalp (like my hair mostly is!)

    ReplyDelete
  5. Saee Koranne-KhandekarApril 22, 2011 at 12:57 PM

    Got my hair cut and colored today--thank you for the inspiration. Except, my hairdresser kept telling me how thin my hair is. Sigh.

    ReplyDelete
  6. ArchanaMay 5, 2011 at 1:57 AM

    Good to read a post from you finally SJ...please tell no what u do for veddy veddy thick hair...mine is veddy veddy thin hair, grey and falling :( :(

    ReplyDelete
  7. lubnakarim06May 17, 2011 at 3:51 AM

    Missssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssed your writing.....no masala vadae to treat to avoid those blues...nice to see u back in action.....


    Finally u had hair cut....i agree with u when someone else does oil massage on scalp and wash hair....it's heavenly....refreshing too..

    Love reading through it...cant' stop laughing on last lines...all smiles....:-)

    ReplyDelete
  8. CherylJuly 6, 2011 at 2:22 AM

    You are so funny!
    I enjoyed this.
    I have to tell that when I was reading your blog a couple of months ago I watched the video you posted of Kurt Nilsen. Whenever I need a pick me up I watch him on You Tube. My favourite one is - Beautiful Day. Thank you so much for posting him on your site.

    ReplyDelete

To avoid letting your comments go to my trash, always appreciate me and my posts! I will do the same :P

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