Monday, April 18, 2011

Hair cuttery

I cannot do small talk. Yes, I know you guys must be shocked. Me, SJ the only-nonsense, 24/7 talking crap girl can't do small talk. Two reasons- I can't say what I really want to say (that would be disastrous) and in some places I just want to get the job done and go home. The hair salon is a good example. Just cut my hair tell how much, I pay we say bye bye I prefer it this way and so do the people in the Desi hair salon. But that freaking place is 15mins drive and I have to wait for J to take me there. The local one is a 5min walk from my place and I just had to lose 1kg (what better and easy way to lose weight than to cut your hair). And this was what happened.

She- Hello, what you want.
Me (what I said WS) - hair cut
(what I wanted to say WWS)- Bra fitting! WTH woman this is a hair salon right?

She- You want shampoo?
Me WS- yes
WWS- hell yeah!
I don't know you folks but I love to get my hair washed by hands other than mine. Just sit back and relax while those hands work magic..aaahhh..just like chocolate melting in your mouth. ahhhh.... sooo nice...yeahh there that area has been itching for some days yessss....ahhh...

She- My name Sun what yours?
WTH!!! Really, now? Introductions??!
WWS- Moon hahahhahaa...

She- you from India?
Me WS- yeah
WWS-Is that why you woke me up?

She- yeah I can tell.
Me WS- grin
WWS- great. Next year's Noble award goes to you.

She- India people have thick hair. Yours so thick.
Me WS- grin
WWS- ayooo..aunty please stop.

She- what you do for such thick hair?
Me WS- grin
WWS- eat gobar.

She- Now your hair heavy because its wet. Its heavy?
Me WS- yeah.
WWS- you want to weigh it?

She- ha ha your face so leetil, hair so heavy.
Me WS- grin
WWS- someone just kill me.

We then proceeded to her station for the hair cut.
cut cut cut
She- so thick your hair.
Me WS- grin
WWS- gun or machete which is better?

She- veeddy dry much hair.
Me WS-.....
WWS- Dear God, why thou me hatest?
cut cut cut cut cut cut cut cut cut cut cut cut cut cut cut cut cut cut remember its veddy thick cut cut cut cut cut cut cut cut cut cut

She- done. you like it?
Me- yeah. Can you just blow dry also?
The look on her face was just priceless LOL!
She- Blow dry is extra 10$.
Like that was going to deter me. I love a blow dry as much I love getting my hair shampooed by a stranger :D


She- so thick you need to thin it leetil
Me WS- .......
WWS- how? take bath in HCl?
She- ok all done.
Me WS-sigh (yeah I really did sigh)

OK now don't you guys start feeling sorry for Ms. Sun and start to think that I am a evil client. Ms. Sun convinced me that I needed some special shampoo and conditioner for my thick hair.

J- You were gone for so long!
Me- Yeah shampoo, cut and blow dry took time.
J- how much ?
Me- 70$
J- Whaaa?? Its just 20$ for a cut.
Me- Yeah, she made me buy some shampoo/conditioner and charged extra for the blow dry because I have 'veddy thick' hair.
J- The Desi salon is better, no?
Me- ..............