Wednesday, July 1, 2009

I have been tagged...groan!!!

Tag, just not very fond of that word. Tag is a word that is attached to all things unpleasant (according to me), like you know- price tag, tag with my husband to the electronic store (and look at brain numbing wires and circuits blegh!), the game Tag (in which I always lose, sob!), skin tag, tag team (wrestlers, now who would want to watch two naked mass of muscles smeared in oil fighting?! yuck!) and the blog tag (because I have to rack my brains to write something funny. Well its not compulsory to be funny but I like to be funny - whatever that means!)

Anyway, I am doing this tag only because (listen carefully people) only because Aparna (she tagged me) has promised to give me writing lessons for free!! Hallelujah!!!!
So 7 things that annoy me (I can't bother to distinguish between annoying behaviours and annoying people so it's a jumbed mix):

1) My husband J who just simply cannot chop vegetables without ensuring that the chopped pieces are all 1' by 1' pieces with pointy ends. Arghhh just cut it already, anyways it's going into the pressure cooker to become mush!

2) I can study only in pin-drop silence, any small noise bugs the hell out of me. I hate, HATE it when people sit next to me in the library and drink something. The suuuuurrrrp... followed by gulp sound is like someone drilling a hole in my brain. I usually end up moving somewhere else. No, don't even ask how I feel when they eat chips.

3) People who drip sarcasm all over and think that its overly funny. They definitely need therapy.

4) Guests who treat my house as theirs and radiate their infinite wisdom. For example, one lady opened my freezer:
"oohh, I see you have frozen the blueberries and what is this Dal? You freeze cooked dal?"
"yeah, it makes my life simpler. I just thaw the dal and can whip up a rasam or sambar in 5 mins"
"But how long is it going to take to cook dal in a pressure cooker? 5 mins no? Freezing foods is not good. The food loses its taste yada yada ...."'s my house, my freezer and my dal, I can do whatever I want!!

5) Narrow minded brahmins who eat eggs in the 'hidden form' like cakes and biscuits but make a fuss when they see me eating omlettes or when I say I hate eggless cakes. Like, I just don't get that!

6) My professor's know-it-all attitude (especially about India and other developing countries)
"So how much does it cost to deliver a baby in India?'
"When I deliver a kid, I will let you know"
"No, I mean is it around 50,000 bucks?"
"Bucks is what, dollars or rupees?"
"Oh, dollars"
me feeling faint
"That's like 2,500,000 rupees!!! I am certain it's not so much"
"Hmm...maybe you guys don't have as much prenatal care as we do"
me fainted

7) Periods. Yes, periods bug the hell out of me. The stomach cramps, the bloated feeling, the irritation, the disgust, the back-ache and everything else associated with Mother Nature's gift to womenkind. I am in a very good mind to get myself pregnant.

So my bakras who have to do this tag are (drumroll please) in alphabetical order:
1. Nags - because I like her and I read somewhere that she loves doing tags.
2. Nandu- because I like her, she hasn't done a post in a while and definitely needs a break from that Barrons' guide.
3. Rush - because I like her, she tolerates my nonsensical comments eveytime and I want to see if she can do this tag poetically :P
Last person, yeah you guessed it,
4. Sakshi - woman you need to post something. Do this please. Will knit you a sweater. And yes, I like you (sigh!).
So Aparna when we can start the writing lessons?

Added after reading your comments: If you really, rrrrrrrreeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaally like me do the tag. If not sigh.. I might have to sing "Mera jeevan kora kagaz..."


  1. So when can we expect to see chota SJ ?

  2. Maa Kasam Chodungi nahi tujhe SJJJJJJJJ....for this blasphemy!!! U tagged me Y O Y?? U want the whole blogger community to know what annoys me? V funny and after that my blog will be comment less!!!

    Am wondering how come you didn't put me on that list along with J...bribing haan to expose me to other bloggers??? So you plan to get every year pregnant till menopause???

  3. noways..are u kidding me?
    im totally ignoring this post!!

  4. @Saee,
    sniff sniff..thanks
    Do it re..for my sake..will bake u something and make u something
    Spoil sport- no fun.

  5. i hope, your professor's words were true..we could have been somewhere down there on the list of most populated countries....;-D
    A request without urinating...can u please give me a lesson on how to cut vegetable into pieces with pointy ends...plzzz... :D

  6. ur prof sucks!!

    i remember my class of ETF's at Kellogg's last summer. We made a presentation on BRIC ETF's and after that, an oldie from the crowd (a prof) stands up and says " i dont believe it..TATA took over jaguar.I have seen one of their offices in India, they are so small and look at them trying to take over our best brands.From where do they get all the money?" now that was filled with sarcasm!!
    Our entire group gave him a bangon session after that explaining how & what TATA was(even dragged the ambanis), but that chap was adamant in believing that BRIC's don't have the money.
    All the years that i used to crib anil of being with TCS, one outsider speaks and we cudn't help but stand up!

  7. hee hee...i like sakshi's idea - getting pregnant till menopause...and 50,000 bucks to deliver a baby - now that would really bring down the population growth in india !!

  8. i reaaaaaaaaaaalllllllllly reaaaaaaaaaaallllllllly like u..but im reaaaaaaalllyy not doing any tagssss

  9. @Priya,
    You need to take special class from J. I will let him no you are interested.
    er...ehh....ermmm...whisper* i didn't understand half the thing you wrote :P * But I did get that ur old prof was not given Kellogs cornflakes and a jaguar to drive around so he was pissed and he wanted a job in TCS but Anil refused. Sigh..i hear ya girl!
    OK you reeeeaaalllly don't have to do it if you reeeeaallly don't want to!
    Ya, I plan to take her as my nanny. That man is screw loose ya.

  10. Me likes u re and all the knitting stuff I plan to smuggle out of will do the tag if I come back unscathed from visiting a nutcase this weekend!!

  11. SJ, I charge a hefty fee for writing lessons. You have to point your gun to all those readers who commented on your post and direct them my way.
    I paid 19,000 bucks for the first.(Almost 14 years ago) and 26.000 for the second.(almost 8 years)Both c-section. I guess pre-natal was rather good as both of them thrived.The poor prof needs to go through some child birthing experience in India.
    BTW, does J know his hair is under threat? Sibal means business.
    EYPT.(thats enjoyed your post thoroughly)When is the baby coming?

  12. By the way, I cheated. I was supposed to do 10 things that annoy me. Gave up after 7 as my creative juices stopped flowing. May be you can add 3 more things later as a follow up to the post.

  13. So ur hubby can cut veggies so perfectly? I'm so J!...
    As for nosy of my neighbors rearranges my showcase, my dishes, the magnets on my fridge, she even arranged my dishes once. Her way is supposed to be perfect. I don't open the door for her most of the time now:)...

  14. yeah i hate when guests come to my home and start behaving as if its their home, its so annoying and irritating! btw good one SJ...

  15. hi, nice post :)
    Ahh i hate the periods time too, but i really dont think gettin Preg is a gr8 ohh syaing only coz i', preg now and hate the throwing up, the back pain and all that.. :(
    I hate the stupid attitude that others hav about india and all the things there.. Recently i had this comment about how racist we Indians r againt Indians itself, comments abt languages and wat not...

  16. Since Aparna decided to divulge her delivery charges I too am game to reveal all...
    Paid 8-9k RUPEES for 1st[2001]
    Paid 11-12k for 2nd.
    Ironically my inlaws had come to b'lore to help for my 2nd delivery & they stayed in a place which charged 12k for 5 days;-P

    Hypocrites I tell u people at #5.

    Ummm...u did notice didnt u tht I also had tagged u?????

  17. I don't want to say something which will make you go add 8th thing :D Good ones anyway, can totally identify with each one. SJ, add 'subscribe to my blog' link please.

  18. @Aruna,
    @Sakshi- you again!?,
    I know you won't do it cos I tagged you, someone you like might tag you.
    If I write 3 more, I will lose most of my friends so its better I stop! Ohhh you greedy lady, you have 45 comments within 12 hours and you want more?! Ja dn his hair- anything to remove 10th exams!
    Don't be J its v v annoying! OMG! your neighbour sound worse than my friend..therapy!
    Yeah, why can't they do it @ their place hufff...
    Sigh yes true getting preg. might not be such a good idea... indians racists on indians (pardon the wrong sentence formation, its 5am) I have seen that many times- people in Karnataka make fun of people in Tamil nadu all the time! nuts!

  19. fun read......i know when people question about your daal...he he...
    and the know all professor..
    one of my professor's claimed that he was the one who was working on the project and Linus Pauling got the Nobel....ha ha ...

  20. That was funny, prenatal and post nata care in India is absolutely out of the world..tell your prof most kids in rural india are born for free at home, and its simpler than giving birth in water (like angelina jolie)

  21. LOL @ your husband's perfect vegetable chopping :) Trust a man to want to do something useless - perfectly :)

    and your guest who decides to treat your home as theirs :) I hate it too when people do that and then hand out advice or say things like - 'it takes just 15 mins to cook a curry'!!!!

    eggs in hidden form!! LOL!

    As for your prof's questions! LOL! I had a client, when I was working in the US, who asked me if we had birth control pills in India!!! I was so gob smacked at the question, can't tell you!!

  22. @reflection,
    yeeps! all my photos are at home. I will do it definitely!
    Chae you should have said it. Now I am SO curious. Your wish is my command, I've added the link. Don't know why you want to be tortured!
    ROFL at pauling! Some people are total nuts!!
    Yes ma'am will let him know ma'am.
    waht you didn't know? useless=men!

  23. Why do u need writing lessons... your post is a riot. I agree with u on the guests... it can be irritating since my fridge is stocked with so many sauces, etc that I always get comments on it. Sigh, wish my hubby could cut vegetables... he can only butcher it :-)


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