Thursday, July 30, 2009

so NOT funny!

In order to compensate (yeah compensate) for the loss of their still born baby, Kate and John decide to adopt a child *why why? you have 2 kids already! Get a dog or cat!* They are attracted to a little girl *who is sitting all by herself when the other kids are having a riot downstairs* who is busy painting *like not 9yr old painting ok? It looks like some Picassa painting*. This little girl, *more like little creep* Esther *or freako* is adopted by Kate and John *or crackpots of the century* and they take her home.

Soon, weird things start to happen and Kate suspects Esther *freako* is not as angelic as she looks *Kate, what was I yelling at you?*. The headmistress gets murdered *reason why headmistress should not interfere in matters outside school* and Esther *freako* enlists the help of her sister Max who is deaf & dumb *poor child is just a sweetheart* to dispose the body. When Max's brother, Daniel suspects something is wrong, Esther *freako* threatens to cut off his penis *promise this is what she said* if he told his parents anything.

Then Esther *freako* ______ Daniel and he gets admitted in the hospital. Not satisfied with that Esther *freako* _______, leading Kate to slap Esther *freako*. John being the prototype of stupid men does not listen to his wife *MEN LISTEN TO THE WOMEN! THEY ARE BORN WITH SOMETHING EXTRA OKAY???* and suspects there is nothing wrong with Esther *freako* and leaves Kate at the hospital and takes Esther *freako* and Max *sweetypie* home *John, you rotten egg, you are going to pay for this*.

Esther being the freako that she is, dresses up like a _______ and tries to _______ John *holy fck!* Meanwhile Kate gets a call from the orphanage that Esther *freako* is not a child but a ________ *yeah Kate you mega tubelight? Did your bulb light up now?!!* She rushes home to save Max and John. But, she finds John lying in a pool of _________ *John, John, John, I hate to do this to you but, "I told u so I told u so na..na..na..I told u so!" you male chauvinistic pig, in your next avatar listen to your woman ok?*. Esther *freako* is now in her true avatar and is going around the house with a _______ searching for Max. Kate manages to save Max in the end *I have purposefully left out details of how she saves Max*.

So I come out of the theatre after watching this movie (its called Orphan, in case any of you are interested) with a severe headache, because of improper breathing (read: forgot to breathe in many scenes, overdose of oxygen due to excessive gasping in other scenes). Had a realllly bad sleep that night because I kept imagining Esther coming out from underneath my bed with a jack hammer! I got to my lab the next morning and went upstairs to another room to get ice. I opened the door and had a near death experience, when I saw :


005

staring at me!!

Zulfi, is usually kept the far end of the room. I am guessing the cleaners smoked pot the previous day and in their semi-conscious state decided to make Zulfie the official lab receptionist. Zulfie is pretty ok, just few teeth missing,

009

But he did scare the shit out of me that day.

17 comments:

  1. Zulfi sounded like a babe to me.
    and in that scary state..u were carrying ur camera to go click click click, and zulfi smiles back with a broken tooth?

    Holy crap!!!!cut his penis off? r u kidding me? did u hear it right?

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  2. i could guess name of the movie in the first 2 sentences ;) these kind of movies freak me out too!

    I think I have seen Ring, that also freaked me out.

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  3. Duh! such a spoiler you are. This movie would have been a nice way to torture M than the gtalk youtube status I put up. I am now waiting for Samy to go to Kindergarten and learn to read. Then will make him read this post to understand the repercussions of getting an older sister *grins*

    Why Zulfi? Am analysing the skeleton and my Symbolist knowledge tells me that the unfortunate chassis shown in your photograph is that of a virgin from the fairer (not the fair and lovely kind) sex who died under suspicious circumstances inside a university lab.

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  4. Rush,
    cell phone camera! Go watch the movie, thats what she says "I will cut it off before you even know what its used for" or something like that!
    Mints,
    Hey are you on Ravelry? I hate these type of movies God knows why I go to watch them!
    Sakshi,
    Don't even dare take Samy to any such movies! I still imagine she will be there in the bathtub behind the curtains brrr...
    One more Dan Brown book you read I will come and make you stand like the Vitruvian Man!!

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  5. hahahahaha :D ok one movie to keep away from! I don't watch horror movies anyway!

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  6. Yikes !! How did you sit thru this one ? This kind of stuff freaks me out completely..silly movies with the so typical 'scary' stuff give me at least a week of sleepless nights !!

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  7. LOL ! I'm surprised you didn't walk out halfway thro' the movie! I would have. I could not even read thru your write up of the movie. You have amazing tolerance, girl !

    And, yes, I also want to know, Why Zulfi?

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  8. SJ yes, search by mints also on nupur's friends list.

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  9. ohh God..no, i will not watch this movie..but SJ, there's something for you there on my post...go and get it.. :)

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  10. ayyoo..ayyayyoo..Thanks heavens I didnt drag V for this movie,after our nice day out n lunch..We roamed around thinking if we should go or not..I would have literally fainted or puked or something like that..haha..I am picturising u ,eyes popping outside like bulls-eye's seeing zulfie..:D

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  11. ha ha...freako!!!!
    i am sure you punched poor zulfi n he lost his teeth...

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  12. Was this movie a horror flick or for kids?
    Zulfie is kind of cute and i am wondering what made him lose his teeth.Maybe zulfie is a she and she kind of chewed off something before the poor male even realized what it was for and in the process lost some of her precious pearls.
    Good for you zulfie.

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  13. What you studying about? Horror and terror!?

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  14. Hee-hee-hee! For a post titled "so NOT funny!" this was hilarious!! I can imagine your state while enduring the movie- my sympathy:)
    PS: All these comments are soooooo funny. I really liked Ishita's "thoughts":)
    PPS: And yeah, why Zulfie?...maybe we can hope for a post on that?

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  15. I posted the comment from Ishita's site. So dont think she is that precocious OK?

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  16. What a sad movie...i usually enjoy horror movies but something like bhoot not this yukkkyyyy stuff...

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  17. ohhh what a movie to watch!!! wtach Australia..I loved it and am telling everybody to go watch it!!

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